i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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