Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
i dont even know how to be here
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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