JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize
