I think I just saw someone hide a body.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She's just so happy...and so naked.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
