wat bout pragnant strippers??
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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