it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize