god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
