i jhust puked up my retainher.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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