you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
