they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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