He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
