No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
