We're facebook friends in real life
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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