my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
