She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
