do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
