im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I am naked and annoyed.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
