She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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