why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
