look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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