I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
