he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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