so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
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