It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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