you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
