We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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