one two three fourrrrnication!
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize