I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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