It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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