why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
