I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
