omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
