You're so nebulous sometimes
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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