Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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