Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
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