Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
