I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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