i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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