Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize