are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
operation have a gay friend backfired
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
