it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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