In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize