Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I am one with the molecules
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
