so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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