Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
