Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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