i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
