Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
