I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
