i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
