Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I just want nice things and good sex
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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